Throuple

A horrible, horrible portmanteau word. A word like “bromance” or worst of all for me, “Movember”.

After several drinks my enthusiasm for doing things and getting other people to enjoy them (stop it) tends to over-ride all sense. Suddenly I’m suggesting sponsored cycle trips to Paris, the three peak challenge or ski weekends with all sorts of random acquaintances.

On this occasion we were at drinks with tall Thomas from up the road (who we've played with on several occasions) and I suggested he join us for a ridiculous personal shopping experience at Top Man. “Ooh we’re such a throuple” said Tom with delight. It was like a cold shower. I realised we risked crossing a blurred line from couple hanging out with single friend to dangerous territory. Here be dragons.

Touting in Soho

The other night found me in a basement bar in Soho nursing an over-priced lager having been fleeced for £20 by the voluptuous lady on the door.

Flatdating

With the room to rent ad going nowhere I recently conceded that I needed to try something else. The lurid sticker on my chest confirmed that I was hustling. Resisting the tendency to congregate with the other hustlers and bitch about the people looking for rooms ("don't they know what a double room in Kennington costs...that paint is Farrow and Ball") I got the elbows out and made with the iPhone.

Yup - I have finally worked how to put pictures in files so I only ever need to show what's relevant ("can I see how the garden is going?" "Sure Mum - let's just hope we don't see R's penis at the same time"). Armed with iPhone I did ok. Dermot worked in IT and had relocated to London from Manchester and could see there was room for his Mac and Tom was starting a training contract with a city law firm and it's an easy commute.

I liked Tom and he liked the flat but he was smart (they’re pretty focused those millenials). He declared that he wanted to move in and once I’d confirmed that the room was his explained that he was looking at something else and promptly went for that. 

Back to square one